UF spokesman Steve Orlando said Friday the university removed a link to a disaster recovery exercise, which detailed how the school could respond to an outbreak of the undead. The link was taken down late Thursday afternoon.

Orlando says officials felt the joke “didn’t really belong” on the site, which also included plans for dealing with hurricanes and pandemics.

The exercise lays out the university’s response to attacks by “flesh-eating, apparently life impaired individuals.” It notes that a zombie outbreak might include “documentation of lots of strange moaning.”

Orlando says the employee who wrote the gag wasn’t punished.

“Why is Osama Bin Laden running for president?”

Of course the only answer I could give her was.

Huh?

“I just saw an ad on TV and there was a sign for Osama Bin Laden”

Are you sure it wasn’t Obama-Biden?”

“Oh, OK”

Well last night we were watching a bit of Larry King, actually I was watching and Michelle was trying to sleep and she asked me (now knowing who the hell Obama is).

“What ever happened to that bidden guy?’”

“His name is Biden, and he is the vice president tomorrow”

“Really, so it’s not Osama Bin Laden” hahaha We have been laughing about this for a few months now that she has the scoop.

She turned around to look at the TV “He’s an old white guy? He’s never going to be president”

“Well he has been a senator since he was 19 and he ran for president twice. Barack could have chosen the woman as a VP candidate but instead he picked he safe old white guy.”

“Well he is old, why didn’t he change his name yet?”

Anyway I was off this year for two weeks again and even though I did not completly drive my family crazy I was starting to miss Dave, Christina and Martin and doing way to much Twittering and seeing too many movies.

Being back I am getting closer to another release upgrade of the software that I support and am really happy that I am finally hands on for something besides kids and cleaning the house.

Here is a picture of a netbook. If my wife sees it maybe she will order it from Dell for me.

I did not have dreams in my last house, mostly because I had a bus that would stop in front of our house all night every night and keep my sleeping light, not deeply at all. Now that I have moved to Airdrie it is nice and quiet and I have been dreaming lots.

Most of my dreams involve me being at work naked or at school and not knowing where I am going. The naked dream always is me sitting at work and realizing that I am naked and when I walk around people are a little shocked (as they should be) at my nakedness. I wonder if this dream is because I used to run on airport runways naked after a night of drinking (very bad idea, could lead to prison) or the fact that I did a strip show once at a pizza drink, again after drinking too much.

When I tell my daughter about the naked dream all she says is “Is your penis showing? Can everyone see your penis?” Well yes, I would suspect that is what they are looking at when they are shocked.

The other dream that I have is that I am going to high school but I have missed a bunch of English classes, which could be because I graduated over 20 years ago, and do not know my locker number or even where my class is.

So earlier this week we had a dream that I was Superman-like. I could jump up and start flying, this was a great dream and one I never had. I did not have any special powers like x-ray vision or burning eye rays or anything.

So hopefully in the future I have less of the naked dreams as well as those stupid school dreams and more super hero dreams. My question though is, how can I have more interesting dreams? I know years back the nicotine patches that I used to try to quit smoking worked well, maybe I can get more of those.

Here is the list for past years even though this year we have no medals so far. Apparently there will be more medals, including some Olympic medals for Canada this week. I for one will be watching.

Usually it seems that Canada does a lot better at the Olympics but this year? Not so good. I am not sure why. Actually the Winter Olympics are much better for us since there are many more months of winter in this country than Summer months.

Anyway someone please let me know without giving into government bashing as to why we have sucked it so hard this year so far.

Again don’t try to blame the athletes! They train for years and years with no income to try to win a medal, they are not to blame as individuals at all.

Beijing 2008 Olympic Games

I have been watching the Beijing 2008 Olympic Games for about a week now and man it has been great on the HDTV. I recently moved as you can see from two posts down and one of the things that I have been saying for years is that I really wanted to watch sports, especially tennis and the US Open in HD…

Well during the move I made a play on my wife that I wanted to move to Satellite. Once that was in the bag I worked on getting a PVR and sadly our old big screen would not work with a dual tuner PVR unless it would work in HD.

One sale, two store and I had a 42 inch LCD and now the Beijing 2008 Olympic Games are on and in two weeks tennis.

Good for me.

In real life I talk to 3 other people at home, 15 or so people at work on a daily basis and every week I talk to another couple of family members.

So, does this mean that the internet and Twitter are my biggest family and friends. That isn’t just boring but a bit more loserish than it should be

My wifes mom finds it best to live on the fringe of society and although most people that read this may think that I would find that cool, in fact I don’t

So my Mother in Law calls us yeaterday and the house that she is living with is full of Meth users, hookers, everyone deals and everyone seems to shoplift so they can get their drugs an alcohol. She has had enough.

Well she has kind of had enough, she is not ready to get a job but she really wants out and she wanted to stay here, my wife definitely wants her not to be around our kids and disapporves of her moms crazy, minimalist, welfare based lifestyle. She lets her in anyway.

So she stayed last night, got into a shelter this afternoon and I have been trying to explain this to my 8 year old daughter.

Taylor, Grandma doesn’t have money and even though money is not the most important thing it is very important to have enough so that you can decide where to sleep and what to eat. You need to rely on yourself and have a job becasue relying on the government is very very bad.

They say that there is a cycle of poverty and I am sure that is true. My wife broke the cycle and there is no way that I would want my daughter to sit idly by and hope that some guy is going to take care of her because that is a recipe for failure.

So my daughter goes into a shelter today, learns a life lesson on the evils of poverty and now hopefully she remembers that every time she has a chance to make a bad and lazy decision.

Oh and to all the people that say that we should have just let the mother in law stay her. Screw you! I don’t need that kind of attitude and acceptance of the welfare state in my house.

Now I have my daughter at home playing on the computer, my wife out dropping off my son to preschool and I am plugging away on the laptop on the kitchen island waiting for a call to do a change at work. Hopefully that happens soon and I can turn on the TV and see if Family guy is on.

This morning I turned the tables on her. She asked me how the long bus trip was to work and I said “OK, it took and hour” She mumbled about how I don’t have to take the bus often. When the weather changes I can take my bike yada yada yada.

She starts trying to hangup and I countered with.

“I love you sweety, I wish I was a dog so that I could dry hump your leg”

Click….and I hear a dial tone